Thursday, October 16, 2014

Food Review: Hong Kong Jin Tien

Hong Kong Jin Tien

It been a while since I did a food review so I guess this is a good time to do another.

I always said that Singapore food is really shitty. That is true in general terms. However, there are some places that are really good that I would go back over and over again.

I have a weakness for roast duck. Even though I am hokkien but I lived in KL for so many years I might as well be considered half cantonese. Actually, I am half hokkien, one quarter cantonese, and one quarter Hakka.

Singapore are full of hokkiens and teo chews. And people from both dialects generally cook shitty food. But not the cantonese, these people are dead serious above their food.

There are quite a lot of Cantonese around the Tiong Bahru area. Further down the road towards Zouk, you will find some shop houses. That's where I found HK Jin Tien.

They are situated opposite Great World City Mall on Zion Road, a couple of doors away from Pepperoni.

When a restaurant's name has got the word "HK" in it, it is safe to say that you will have no problem if you order your food in Cantonese. The old lady ask me what I wanted in Mandarin but I replied in Cantonese. The service level went up a few notches right away. I was like "shee fook sai".

So for those sinkie cocksuckers, please learn a bit of cantonese before you come to this shop.

I ordered roast duck and sausage. If you are a Hong Kong style restaurant and if your roast ducks taste anything less than heavenly, I think you should just go and fucking kill yourself. Because you would be a disgrace to the whole Cantonese community in this world. It is worse, if you're a fucking hokkien in Sinkieland, put a sign board that says "HK something something" and then serve like really shitty roast duck, then you should be raped in your ass with a baseball bat. I fucking kid you not. Lei mah ka lo fa hai.

The two most important parts of roast duck are the breast and the thigh. I ordered the thigh.

Oh, man. It was good!!! Nay, it was mother fucking great. I would have to say it is the SECOND BEST roast duck in the whole of fucking Singapore. and yes, I have tried A LOT of them.

I will not tell you where you can find the BEST roast duck in the whole Singapore. Then every weekend I will have to queue behind some stupid sinkie cocksuckers before I get to my favorite roast duck thigh.

The skin was thin and light. There was just a nice layer of fat below the skin. Not too fat and it was not dry. I fucking hate roast duck skin that is dry. That means you kung fu is not good enough that you allowed the skin to go dry.

The thigh meat was soft and succulent. The taste just exploads in your mouth. This comes from pure skill. You can't fucking produce this if you are not a fucking sifu!!!

Don't eat so much of the rice. Ideally, you shoul finish at least 3/4 of the thigh before you even start eating the rice.

I took this picture with my iPhone so it really doesn't do it justice. [The ironlady cocksucker blogger can suck my dick and call me daddy. Chao Hai. What kind of shitty name is that? Is he a fucking tranny?]

Anyway, the sausage on the other hand was just alright.  A bit too dry but still tasty.

The lady owner sat down at my table and we started talking. Why? Because I am handsome, you cocksucker.

Apparently, they just opened at this location. They used to be at the TB Wet market for many years.

I took the opportunity to ask her something that I couldn't explain since I came to Singapore.

Why is it that you can find lots of roast duck but you can't find roast goose??

I wanted to know because there's this one restaurant in KL (Somewhere in Pudu, but parking is so tight that it is like fucking a duck in the ass, without lubes... that's how fucking bad the the parking situation] that serves both. And it is a real treat to have both in the same meal. I can't explain it, you got to try it and figure out for yourselve.

Anyway, she explained to me that sinkie cocksuckers don't know how to raise goose. In fact, I believe if you ask any sinkie on the street if they have ever seen a real goose, maybe one in 2 million would say yes. This is how fucked up sinkies are. And they still fucking think they are a jem compared to Malaysian? Go figure right?

She told me that the goose you can find in Sinkieland is only as big as a duck. And that's not going to work because you need a good size goose to make a nice roast goose.

Those that are big enough come from, you guessed it, MALAYSIA. So, sinkie cocksuckers can kiss my ass.

Also, she said the goose from Malaysia is so expensive that it is almost the same price as a suckling pig. So no one, particularly cheapskate sinkies, would pay that kind of price for roast goose no matter how tasty it is.

The price at this place is not cheap though. I had duck thigh + sausage with barley ice and the bill came up to S$13.80.

I will be back. That's for sure.