Peach Garden Fried Carrot Cake

In life sometimes you must make assumptions when arriving at a decision.

I love fried carrot cake a.k.a chye tow kuay.

I read in the news that your CABINET MINISTER, Acting Community Development, Youth and Sports Minister , Major General (NS) Chan Chun Sing, who said:

“(For example,) you go to Peach Garden, you eat the $10 XO Sauce chye tow kuay (fried carrot cake), you can be quite happy right? Because you are satisfied with the service and so on. On the other hand, you can go to a hawker centre, even if they charge you $1.50, you might not want to eat it if the quality is not good.”

I have some FACTS so I have to make assumptions about the rest:

FACT: He is an [acting] cabinet minister. Nay, a Singapore cabinet minister.

FACT: He's paid around a million dollars a year [plus minus S$10.00].

Assumption: He is rich therefore he must eat at really expensive and good restaurants all the time. Then, it is reasonable to think that he would have refined taste and not like some heartland fucker.

Assumption: He is a cabinet minister, so he must be telling the truth and has actually tried that stupid carrot cake before.

The problem is should I trust him?

What if I spend S$10 and the carrot cake taste like shit???

I kept thinking, this is a SINGAPORE cabinet minister wor.... how can I be wrong following him?

On second thoughts, I think I just eat my chye tow kuay when I go back to my home town in Malaysia during CNY. Singapore food taste like shit anyways.

Sorry, you guys are stupid crazy to pay S$10.00. As for how much you should pay your minister, I don't know la, not my country.

Anyway, this is the real thing:

Tell your minister, got money also not waste like that mah.

Alien? Why?

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Referee Kayu? You Fucking Sore Loser, yes or not?

I was walking pass a mini market just now and tabloid on the newsstand scream

"REFEREE KAYU"... meaning to say last night fucking Singapore football team shouldn't have lost to Kelantan.

I mean come on...

You are the fucking riches country in Southeast Asia, you lost to a team from the POOREST STATE in Malaysia.

What fucking excuse have you got??? Blame the referee? Did the field in the stadium PONDED??? Is that the other reason you lost??

You fucking cocksuckers should all go and kill yourselves in shame.

You are the country in SEA that spends the MOST money gambling at football. You also pay the most to fucking Singtel so that you can watch EPL.

Watch so much for fuck ah?

I myself have absolutely no interest in football at all.

But to know a humble team from my hood came to YOUR COUNTRY and fucking beat you at a game you're soooo passionate TALKING ABOUT AND GAMBLING ON....

is so so sweet.

AMEN. ALLAHU AKBAR.

[P.S. The COCKSUCKERS subsequently lost 0-1 to Trengganu, the 2ND POOREST STATE IN MALAYSIA!!! SIA SUAY LAO PEH]

Anwar Acquitted! Next Stop Putrajaya.

Anwar is acquitted.

It would have been crazy for UMNO to send him to jail.

So what if he likes to butt-fuck young men? Anyway, I don't think he was guilty in this particular case. Even if he did, it was selective prosecution on the part of AG.

Come on, you know how many gays are there in KL alone? Which one of them had been charged, let alone jailed, for butt-fucking?

Anyway, the point is not about Anwar being in jail or not, I don't think it changes my vote in the next election even a single bit.

Listen UMNO, and listen carefully.

If you take the Perkasa Nazi, Ibrahim Ali, out to the court yard, and put a bullet into his head, I will vote for you.

Deal????

Getting A Woody

My wife insisted that I write something about this.

You see, if you look at the bottom of my blog post, you can register your reaction to my post by clicking on anyone of the choices. One of them is "getting a woody".

Somehow I get the sense that maybe people don't quite know what is it. Because I get people clicking on that button all the time.

So for you cocksuckers who never leave your house and masturbate with your Indonesian maid's underwear, getting a woody does NOT mean:

this:

nor this:

nor this:

It means THIS:

as in GETTING AN ERECTION!

in your case, it is most likely be ONLY LIKE THIS!

So go ahead, make my day:

Get a woody.

Grace Fu

I feel like I should say something about Grace Fu.

But I think I won't because ICA may be reading my blog and IT IS POSSIBLE that they will find my blog post to be interfering with your domestic politics.

You see Grace, self-restraint is not that difficult, is it?

Good night.